delyverence (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
delyverence) wrote2017-08-18 08:02 am
delyverence) wrote2017-08-18 08:02 am
"Your lips are turning blue..."
So, here's why I'm a dumbass. Onions are surprisingly slippery. Last night, I was zipping through my mise en place, cutting squash, a red pepper, and mushrooms into big chunks for sauteeing. When I got to the onion, I was so focused on how big I wanted my onion chunks that I forgot about the 3 other times my knife had slid off the onion and cut me (I usually just nick a fingernail or something, no big). Apparently, the universe thought I needed a better reminder because POOF, I sliced through 2/3 of the tip of my thumb.
Well, shit. Like, I NEED that thumb, y'all. That's the one you use for running in video games. Also hair washing, holding a razor to shave my right pit, and a host of other things I haven't discovered yet.
I put down the knife and walked into the nerd lair, where Chris was in the middle of a video game mission. "I just sliced through my finger," I said. "Oh? He said, still playing." "Dude...look." He looked over to see a paper towel getting redder by the second. I was freaking out a little because I was hungry and bleeding + hungry = passing out to my low blood pressure-having ass.
No big. I mean this is a Tuesday for him. He turned off the video game and then patched me up with some fancy band-aids. The bleeding stopped faster than expected, so I talked him out of stitches, but of course once the initial "holy shit" wore off and we were sitting at the kitchen table finishing up, everything started going dark orange and I couldn't hear very well.
"I might need you to hand me my water."
"Why? You feeling faint?"
"I'm going down, man."
So, he half-dragged me to the couch and put my legs up over the back. "Dude, your lips are blue....oh...getting pink....ok, pink."
Anywho, I'm glad he was there, cause otherwise I would have just stopped the bleeding and then laid down on the couch with a jar of peanut butter. Here's hoping that fucker heals soon because it's not exactly easy to clean the house or take loads of stuff to Goodwill with one hand. Meh, I'm pissed at myself for this. I have shit to do! Heaaaaal.
Well, shit. Like, I NEED that thumb, y'all. That's the one you use for running in video games. Also hair washing, holding a razor to shave my right pit, and a host of other things I haven't discovered yet.
I put down the knife and walked into the nerd lair, where Chris was in the middle of a video game mission. "I just sliced through my finger," I said. "Oh? He said, still playing." "Dude...look." He looked over to see a paper towel getting redder by the second. I was freaking out a little because I was hungry and bleeding + hungry = passing out to my low blood pressure-having ass.
No big. I mean this is a Tuesday for him. He turned off the video game and then patched me up with some fancy band-aids. The bleeding stopped faster than expected, so I talked him out of stitches, but of course once the initial "holy shit" wore off and we were sitting at the kitchen table finishing up, everything started going dark orange and I couldn't hear very well.
"I might need you to hand me my water."
"Why? You feeling faint?"
"I'm going down, man."
So, he half-dragged me to the couch and put my legs up over the back. "Dude, your lips are blue....oh...getting pink....ok, pink."
Anywho, I'm glad he was there, cause otherwise I would have just stopped the bleeding and then laid down on the couch with a jar of peanut butter. Here's hoping that fucker heals soon because it's not exactly easy to clean the house or take loads of stuff to Goodwill with one hand. Meh, I'm pissed at myself for this. I have shit to do! Heaaaaal.
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